Azumanga und Panzer!
by Technomad
Summary: An earthquake and tsunami destroys their town, forcing the Azu girls to transfer to Oorai High. The new school's on a high from unexpectedly winning the Tankery championship, and our heroines decide to get in on that action. How will they react to Tankery, and how will the sport change them? Unexpectedness awaits!
1. Chapter 1

Azumanga und Panzer!

by Technomad

Chapter One

The girls stood in silence, looking at the ruins of their town. Finally, Sakaki broke the silence. "We survived the tsunami and earthquake, at least," she said.

"But where will we live? Where can we go to school now?" Tomo Takino was sometimes obnoxious, but this time she'd cut to the heart of the matter. The town was utterly ruined, and everybody who'd survived was sleeping in tents and eating in a Self-Defense Force portable mess hall.

"Let's find Yukari-sensei. She'll likely know." Chiyo-chan suited action to words, walking off toward where they thought that their homeroom teacher was likely to be. Overhead, gulls called out to each other, their sad keening cries echoing the desolation in their hearts.

When they found her, Yukari was in no mood to talk. She was sitting in the mess hall, sobbing quietly, as Miss Kurosawa tried to console her. When she saw the girls, she got up to intercept them. "Please don't bother Yukari right now. She just found out that her parents were killed in the tsunami."

"Oh." At that, the girls moved away, sitting down at a different table. They had all found that their parents were alive, and they knew how very lucky they were. As it happened, they'd been on a field trip inland when the tsunami hit, and finding their families when they came back had taken some time.

The next few days were very busy. The efficient Japanese emergency services had moved in quickly, but there was lots of work to be done. All of the girls volunteered to help out; even little Chiyo-chan did all she could, until she quietly collapsed and Sakaki scooped her up into her arms and took her back to the tent they all shared with a dozen other girls from their school.

There was a mass funeral and memorial service for all who had been lost, and the whole town was there; everybody had lost friends or family. The media was there, but they kept a respectful distance as people spoke, often through tears, of the people who had been lost. Sakaki "accidentally" tripped into one intrusive cameraman, knocking his camera to the ground. His howls were firmly shut off by Mr. Kimura, who'd been doing a heroic job coordinating aid efforts ever since the disaster.

"I guess I never thought of Mr. Kimura that way before," admitted Sakaki. She had just come back from hearing a bunch of people singing their teacher's praises.

"He ain't _so_ bad. Ah mean, we all love havin' guys lookin' at us, don't we? Why should we get bent out of shape if'n one does that we don't happen to want?" All the girls looked at Osaka as though she'd grown a second head. She stared back at them, her eyes wide as ever. "What'd Ah say? That's just plain ol' common sense, that is!"

Chiyo broke the silence. "You have unexpected depths, Osaka."

The next day, news about what was to happen next came through. "Looks like we're being transferred. To a school ship," remarked Tono.

"Oorai Girls' High School…I've heard of them!" piped up Chiyo-chan. "They won the Tankery championship last year! It was in all the papers!"

"Yeah," put in Yomi. "People were really surprised, particularly when they were up against Kuromorimine Women's College! Her big sister commands at Kuromorimine, and her mother runs the Tankery team there! They have lots and _lots_ of tanks, including a Maus!"

"Maybe we can join the Tankery club when we get there!" said Kagura.

A few days later, they were settling into their new quarters aboard the Oorai school ship. "This ship is so _huge_!" squealed Yomi. "I heard she's several _kilometers_ long!"

"Compared to other school ships, Oorai's not that big," Sakaki said. She was, as she often was, the calmest of the group. "Kuromorimine's bigger, and Pravda High's ship is _huge_."

"Don't you love these apartments?" said Tomo. "I never got to live all on my own before! This'll be such fun! We can stay over with each other, and have parties, and…oh, it'll be wonderful!" Their parents were aboard the school ship, but there hadn't been room for their families to live together,

so the girls had apartments of their own. One reason for the building of the huge ships was to ease the crowding on the Japanese mainland. They were also proof against earthquakes and tsunamis, something for which all the refugees were profoundly grateful.

"Don't forget, you'll also have school to go to, still," said Miss Tomosawa. She had come up behind the girls, and they all whirled, blushing, to find themselves confronted by their teacher.

"Oh! Excuse us!" The girls bowed reflexively. While Miss Tomosawa was by no means as strict as teachers _could_ be, she was still much stricter than Yukari. Even Kimura, with all his lecherous leers, was stricter than Yukari. He was all business when it came to Classical Japanese. If anything, the more attracted to a girl he was, the harder he came down on mistakes in composition; many girls had been crushed to find that flirting with their teacher translated into harder work and less slack.

"I've come to help you get yourselves the things you need. Accounts have been opened at the school supply shop so you can buy new uniforms." At the thought of buying clothes, all the girls squealed with joy, and they bounced along in Miss Tomosawa's wake willingly.

Sure enough, the shop had been notified of their arrival, and the shopkeepers were all helpful. They were especially enchanted by Chiyo-chan, buzzing around her as they looked through their stock to find a uniform small enough for her. "Oh, the sweet little thing! How brave you must be, to go to school with such older girls!" gushed one.

"They're very nice to me…_usually_," Chiyo-chan replied, giving Tomo a frosty look. "They mostly treat me like either just another of the girls, or as a younger sister they all share in common. Sakaki, here, is especially nice to me. We lived near each other in our old home and would often walk to school together." Sakaki blushed as the shopkeeper gave her a beaming smile of approval. She was rather shy and preferred to blend into the background, something her height and busty figure made difficult at best.

Osaka was being her usual distractible self. "Ooh, look at them ornaments," she said, pointing to a shelf. "They's all tanks!"

"They sure are, miss. Ever since Oorai won the national Tankery competition a few months ago, Tankery's all the rage around here," the shopkeeper said.

"I wonder if they'd let us join the Tankery team? We could form our own squad." Chiyo-chan bounced up and down with excitement.

"That would be very nice, Chiyo-chan!" Miss Tomosawa beamed approval. "Yukari would be very pleased. You do know she was in Tankery herself when she was in school? Along with me?"

"No! Tell us about it!"

"Well, when she was in school, her mother wanted her to get involved in a nice feminine activity. I think her mother had something in mind like flower arranging, though. Was she surprised when she found out we'd both taken up Tankery instead!"

"I bet she was!" Chiyo-chan giggled, which set the others giggling too.

"I was loader on our tank, which was a US-built Sherman. Yukari was our driver. Matter of fact, that's where she learned to drive. Before that, she'd never had her hands on a motor vehicle."

"Oh." Chiyo-chan and the other girls exchanged a silent, significant glance. If Yukari had learned to drive on a tank, that explained a lot. _No wonder she drives like she's invulnerable! Compared to even the lightest tank, a car's nothing to worry about!_ The girls all knew that this would be a fertile source for jokes, later.

"Before we talk about the Tankery, we've got to get you girls settled into your new school, though," said Miss Tomosawa, in a voice that brooked no argument. Obediently, the girls followed in her wake, off to the bookstore for their new textbooks. The originals had almost all been lost in the tsunami.

A few weeks later, the girls were settling into their new routine. As it had happened, Oorai Girls' High had needed a new English teacher and gym teacher, the previous ones having left their jobs due to having babies, and both Yukari and Miss Tomosawa were teaching again. Except for the different uniforms and surroundings, it was almost as though they had never left home.

At first, the strange surroundings intimidated them, and the girls clung together closely. Gradually, though, they began to make new friends. One day, Sakaki was chatting with a couple of girls in the hallway, and the subject of Tankery came up. Sakaki's eyes went wide when she found out that the girl she was talking to was Miho Nishizumi, who had led the school's team to victory recently. Miho, for her part, was welcoming and rather tended to downplay her victories, saying that they were as much due to her teammates as her own efforts.

"I have a cousin at Pravda High who's into Tankery," Sakaki said, "and I might want to get into it myself. What do you think my chances are?"

"Oh, I don't think they're too bad." Miho gave Sakaki a long look. "Is your cousin's name Nonna, by any chance?"

"Yes, it is! You know her?"

"We've met. Do you have any friends who might want to help you form a squad?"

"A group of us all came here together after the tsunami. You remember about that?"

"Oh, sure! If you want to join up together, that would be wonderful! It would help you get integrated with the rest of the school faster!" Miho gave an excited little squeal.

"Can we come around and get acquainted with the rest of the club?"

"We're meeting tonight in the garage. We'll look forward to seeing you!"

That evening, the girls gathered together, and went over to the school garages, with Sakaki in the lead. They were met by Miho and her crew, who introduced themselves as Saori, Hama, Yukari and Mako..."the Anglerfish Team," as Miho told them.

"This is our tank," said Miho, pointing to a squarish, angular-looking contraption. "It's a Panzer IV Ausf. H. It used to be configured rather differently, but we upgraded it a couple of times. It was built originally in Germany."

"Ain't that where tanks was invented?" asked Osaka, staring at the tank in wonderment.

Miho and her friends all giggled. "No, the British invented the first tanks. That was back in World War One, though. And here's the Turtle team's tank. It was originally a Panzer 38, built in Czechoslovakia, but we got a kit and upgraded it to a Hetzer."

"Where's the turret? Don't tanks have to have turrets?" wondered Yomi. "It looks like that one over there," she pointed to another machine standing nearby. This one had a hippo painted on the side.

"No, 'tanks' don't have to have turrets," said Captain Chono, who was along. "What you're pointing at is a Sturmgeschutz III Ausf. F, and it's run by a bunch of history buffs. They've all taken names from famous military commanders, and in their first couple of matches, they had their machine all blinged up. However, after they got knocked out because people could see their flags even though they themselves were well under cover, they smartened up quickly." The captain smiled. "These days, they're quite effective, and they're good at coming up with plans and historical parallels to the situations the team finds itself in."

After they'd been introduced to all the teams' tanks, Miho then turned to the Azu girls. "And now for you. What sort of tank do you have?"

This was met with dead silence. Finally, Tomo spoke up: "Er, we don't have one. Our school didn't offer Tankery."

Miho's eyes went wide. "Then you'll have to get one. Somewhere."

END Chapter 01


	2. Chapter 2

Azumanga und Panzer

Chapter 02

by Technomad

The girls gathered in a café; none of them had enough room in their apartments to have the whole group over at once. Yukari and Miss Tomosawa were sitting in on the discussion, and had brought along some recent Tankery magazines for them to look through.

"Holy Buddha, look at these prices," muttered Yomi. "I can't believe this!"

"How do people afford this?" asked Tomo. "Here's one of the cheapest ones available, an ex-Soviet T-34, for 5,500,000 yen!"

"Let me see," said Miss Tomosawa. They handed her several recent copies of _Tankery Today_. She began leafing through. "Have you looked through the 'used' ads yet? All the ads you've been looking at are from dealers in new and like-new machines. A used machine is far likelier to be within our budget." Their old school district had had a fund for student activities, and they had found that the money was available to them. On top of contributions from the people of Oorai, who were now inordinately proud of their Tankery team and its dark-horse victories, it came to a respectable sum of money, even if not enough for a brand-new tank.

Sakaki was looking at the most recent copy of _Tankery Magazine_. "Ah, here we go," she said. "Used and refurbished machines for sale." She pulled out a pen and began circling ads. The other girls got busy, and soon they had a list of places to visit.

Yukari-sensei offered to drive them, but they all politely demurred. Chiyo-chan shivered at the mere thought. Instead, they took the efficient Japanese public transport system. Miss Tomosawa came along as a chaperon, and Captain Chono decided to come along, too. The girls were grateful for the adult support.

The first tank they looked at was an old Russian T-26. The old lady who owned it said that she and her schoolmates had won the 1935 national Tankery competition; she nodded understandingly when Captain Chono said that they'd probably need a newer machine. The tank itself was well-kept-up, but it wouldn't last long against anything newer.

"Don't look so disappointed," said Captain Chono. "Picking a tank is a delicate operation. A woman's intuition tells me that there's more to see before a decision has to be made." They accepted her wisdom, and boarded a bus to their next prospect.

The next machine they saw, they rejected almost immediately. It was a decrepit British Valentine tank, and a few minutes' inspection revealed that it was in no shape to be refurbished in any kind of reasonable time.

"The engine's shot to hell," said Kagura, after a long look into the engine compartment. "Looks like it's missing a bunch of parts."

"Take a look at this gun breech! _Yuck_!" Yomi called out from inside the turret. "And I can't get this turret to traverse for love nor money!"

"I don't think we'll be wanting this one, Captain Chono," said Sakaki regretfully. Captain Chono shook her head, agreeing. The owners looked disappointed.

"Look, if you want to sell this tank to anybody but a real expert, you'd best put some money into refurbishing it. It's been neglected for a long time. The hull seems to be sound, but it'll take a lot of repair work before it's anywhere near ready to use." Captain Chono's words were polite, but her tone dripped icicles, and the owners wilted visibly.

When they left, Captain Chono was visibly steaming. "Those scum thought they'd pawn that pile of junk off on you, _did_ they?" she snarled. "Well, I'm reporting them to the Tankery Federation, and they might just have some explaining to do!"

"What's next on the list?" asked Chiyo-chan.

"Next on the list?" Captain Chono looked up at the sky, which was visibly darkening. "Next on the list, dear, is for _you_ and your friends to get back to the school ship. We can go on looking tomorrow." A chorus of disappointed noises greeted this statement, and she smiled slightly as she herded her charges on the bus for their new home. She had found that coaching a Tankery team gave her things in common with her sister, who was raising a family; previously, the two sisters had had little to talk about, but now she could relate to her sister's tales of motherhood, and her sister laughed ruefully with her at stories of her charges' various antics.

The next day, at school, Chiyo-chan got some news that crushed her. "What do you mean, I can't do Tankery?" she gasped.

Anzu and her fellow student council members all looked rather shamefaced to have had to deliver the bad news. "We're sorry. The law says that no one under the age of fifteen can participate. We recognize that you're a very special case in a lot of ways, but we can't make you big enough or strong enough to participate safely."

Chiyo-chan's eyes welled with tears, but she managed to produce a polite farewell and a bow before rushing out of the room. As she left, the council members could hear the first sob. Anzu looked at the others, who all looked very unhappy.

"I don't know about you, but I feel like an absolute heel, having to do that to that lovely, brilliant, bright little girl," she remarked. The others nodded.

The first the Azu group knew about it was when Chiyo-chan burst in on them at lunch and threw herself on Sakaki, sobbing. Reflexively, Sakaki put her arms around their little friend, murmuring soothingly to her. When Chiyo-chan was unhappy, Sakaki was usually the first person she turned to.

"Oh, dear, what ever in the world's wrong, honeybunch?" asked Osaka. The other girls gathered around, even Tomo. Tomo sometimes enjoyed tormenting Chiyo-chan, but when it was important business, she knew enough to snap to.

When Chiyo-chan choked out the news from within the safe shelter of Sakaki's arms, the other girls looked at each other. Then Yomi spoke up. "Maybe we can get Yukari-sensei to talk to them?"

"That's a wonderful idea! An' we can get Captain Chono too!" Osaka's idea met with general approval, and the girls left lunch early to go find their teachers.

Unfortunately, neither their teachers nor Captain Chono could do anything. "It's a matter of size and strength, dears," said Captain Chono, as Yukari-sensei and Miss Tomosawa nodded ruefully. "The Tankery rules were written with the idea that girls that age wouldn't be in schools where the sport was practiced. They weren't expecting a special case like Chiyo-chan."

"Don't feel bad," said Kagura, seeing Chiyo-chan's eyes well up with tears. "We can't take you on the tanks, but you can be our intel person. Study up on the teams we'll be up against, and give us ideas on how they can best be beaten."

"Yeah," said Osaka. "You can be the brains of our team!"

Chiyo-chan perked up, and didn't notice the looks some of the other girls were giving each other. Plain as day they said: _Chiyo-chan can be the brains of our team, because Osaka sure as hell isn't going to be!_ None of them said it out loud, though. Osaka was a space-case in a lot of ways, but she was _their_ space-case, and they'd already warned some of the other girls about making mean comments about her Osakan accent or the strange things she sometimes did. Being uprooted and planted as a group in a new school had forged them into a tight team.

The next day was a Saturday, and they had several more tanks to look at, so they got together at a nearby eatery that catered to Tankery fans. Over snacks, they figured out which route they would take to look at the tanks they wanted to see, and called ahead on their cells to make sure that the owners were available to talk to them.

The first one they saw was an American M-3 Stuart. Yomi and Tono were rather taken by it, but Sakaki, Osaka and Captain Chono weren't so sure.

"Ain't it awfully light?" asked Osaka. "Ah ain't sure about getting into any tank contest with somethin' that small and lightly armored. Not with mah own precious skin on the other side of that armor, Ah ain't!"

"Even for a tank, it's cramped," Sakaki said. "I'd be kind of uncomfortable aboard it."

Captain Chono looked thoughtful. "We may be back. We've several other tanks to look at today, though." When they were on their way to their next prospect, she said: "That tank might not be a bad choice. It's well-kept-up, the price is reasonable, and on the whole, it's not a bad tank at all for learners. However, the main gun is awfully light."

When they got to the next place they were greeted by a man who looked familiar. When they heard his name, the girls' eyes went wide. Kimura was a fairly common name, but still…

"Do you have a relative who teaches?" asked Yomi.

"Sure do! Matter of fact, he taught in you girls' school before the disaster! He was always the scholarly one of us." Sakaki gave the others a significant glance_. Hope this guy isn't the lecher his brother is!_ it said, clear as day.

Mr. Kimura led them around to a garage where a large machine was sitting under a tarp. When he pulled the tarp off, the girls' eyes all went wide. Mr. Kimura smiled proudly. "Only one previous owner since the Soviets sold it! My sister was a Tankery champion in her day, and she kept this baby up like it's straight from the factory!"

"What is it?" asked Osaka. "It don't have no turret!"

"It's a SU-100 tank destroyer, dear," said Captain Chono. She slowly walked forward, running her hand gently over the side of the tank. "And it looks to be in near-mint condition!"

The girls crawled all over the mighty machine, examining everything. "The gun breech is sparkling clean, and oiled so that it opens and shuts very easily!" reported Yomi.

"This here engine looks like it's brand-spankin' new!" called out Osaka, who was head-over-heels in the engine compartment. "Ah cain't find one thing wrong so far!"

"The tracks are in good shape, and barely worn!" said Sakaki. She popped the main hatch and disappeared inside. "And there's room for four of us here, easily. The electronics look to be in good shape, from what I can tell."

When the girls had finished their inspection, and found nothing wrong with the machine, Mr. Kimura got in and fired up the engine. The big 12-cylinder diesel roared to life the first time he tried, and Captain Chono listened to it critically. The engine sounded very smooth, and she smiled.

When Mr. Kimura climbed out, she called the girls over for a quick talk. "I think this may be the machine we really want, girls. Do you mind if I do the talking? You've never bought a tank before."

Sakaki looked at the other girls, saw that they were okay with that, and nodded, giving Captain Chono the go-ahead. Captain Chono gave Sakaki a long look. _We have real leadership potential here behind that quiet exterior,_ she thought. _Perhaps after she's older, I can point her in the direction of the Self-Defense Forces' officer-candidate school?_

Captain Chono turned to Mr. Kimura. "Very well. How much are you asking for her?" When she heard the price, her eyes went very wide. The girls could also hear, and they gasped in wonder.

"I…I think that's quite acceptable," Captain Chono stammered. "Can you deliver it to the Oorai school ship? Right now, it's moored in Oorai." Mr. Kimura nodded, and they made arrangements for payment and delivery.

As they left, Mr. Kimura gestured Captain Chono aside. "You may be wondering why I made them such a good price, Captain." Captain Chono nodded. "Well…for one thing, I don't have any use for it, and it's just taking up space. For two things, my brother told me you might be around, and he wants your group to do really well in Tankery. I lowered the price I might normally ask, since he asked it of me and I owe him some big favors."

On the way back to the school ship, Captain Chono was reassessing the lecherous Classical Japanese teacher her proteges had told her about. He was apparently a man of hidden depths, and not all his liking for high school girls was necessarily shameful.

END Chapter 02


	3. Chapter 3

Azumanga und Panzer!

Chapter Three

by Technomad

When the Azu girls got their purchase back to the Oorai school ship, the rest of the Tankery team were agog. "Oh, merciful Buddha! You got lucky!" squealed Miho.

"That tank makes ours look pretty ratty!" agreed Hana. She pointed to a hatch and raised her eyebrow questioningly, and when Sakaki nodded, she crawled inside. "Oh, my! This gun! It's in perfect order!" She popped out of the hatch, her eyes gleaming. "I wonder how much range it has? It's bigger than any of our main guns!"

Mako looked the SU-100 over with a critical eye. "Yeah, that gun's got enough punch on it to take down anything we're likely to be up against. I'm not sure how I feel about this beast being a casemate model, instead of having a revolving turret, though."

"That allows it to mount a bigger gun," explained Sakaki. "And Hippo Team's Sturmgeschutz III is also a casemate hull."

"Remember how it was up against Kuromorimine? They had quite a few casemate machines; Jagdtigers, Jagdpanzers, and Elefants, among others. Take it from one who knows, those things can be as deadly as any turreted tank ever built," Miho said quietly. The others deferred to her, partly because she was team captain and partly because she had had a great deal of experience with Kuromorimine before changing schools to attend Oorai.

Once the Automotive Club had checked the SU-100 over mechanically and given it two enthusiastic thumbs-ups, they began training. Captain Chono insisted on each girl learning all the various tasks needed to make the SU-100 run. They ran through drills and worked on simulators, as well as exercising their bodies to build up the strength that Tankery crew members needed to have to keep their cranky machines going.

"Man alive, this is a lot of work!" Tomo groused one evening as the Azu girls were walking home. "I think I've lost ten pounds!"

"Don't think of it as hard work. Think of it as improving your figure," quipped Yomi. Tomo took a playful swing at their friend. The girls laughed ruefully. The labor of becoming Tankery practitioners was, indeed, harder on them physically than anything else they had ever done. Captain Chono was a demanding taskmistress. Off the field, she was affable and approachable, but when they were mounted up and on the field, she became a Tartar in the image of the strictest teachers they'd ever had.

The existing Tankery teams at Oorai High were very supportive, though. They had all gone through the same mill, and when one of the Azu girls flagged, the others were there for her, encouraging her, telling her how much fun she'd have with her friends when training was complete.

They worked ceaselessly. Again and again, they tore down and rebuilt the engine, until each of the girls could do it blindfold. They practiced mounting up, until they could scramble into the hatches and turn on the engine from a standing start in less than a minute.

Then they went out to the driving range. They swapped roles back and forth, each of them learning how to drive, co-pilot, load the main gun, fire the main gun, and use the radio. Gradually, a team roster began to emerge.

Sakaki was commander. She was cool-headed in all circumstances, and the other girls all looked up to her, and not just because she was the tallest of them. When she heard that her dear friend was going to be commander, Chiyo-chan jumped and squealed for joy. Sakaki's usual reserve broke and she hugged her little friend.

"I'll paste a picture of you inside the casemate, Chiyo-chan," said Sakaki. "That way, you can be with us in spirit!" All the girls smiled to see their little friend's transport of joy at this simple statement. She came from a family that was wealthier than most of theirs, but she was quite unspoilt and normal, save only for her brilliant mind.

Of all of them, Yomi was the best driver, and she soon won that slot. Yukari-sensei offered to give her tips on driving, but Yomi hastily and politely declined.

"Oh, no, ma'am. Captain Chono's our coach, and she's very strict with us. I don't think she'd be very happy that you were trying to help. She'd see it as interference."

Yukari-sensei nodded, accepting the explanation. "I imagine she is. She should be. Tankery's a demanding sport. My own coach drove us like slaves, but we won quite a few games." Yukari-sensei turned away, and Yomi gave a discreet sigh of relief. Yukari-sensei was a menace on the road, and now that the girls had learned that she'd learned to drive on a tank, that made sense. Even so, none of them welcomed the idea of having Yukari-sensei teaching them how to drive.

The competiton for the gunner's slot was fierce; Kaori Nagawa and Kagura Kurosawa both wanted the job. They spent as much time as they were allowed to aiming and firing the big main gun. Miho marveled at the range they could get. "That thing outranges any tank main gun I've ever seen!" she exulted.

Then, one afternoon, the girls were out at the range, and Captain Chono was talking with Kaori and Kagura about their performance. Meanwhile, the other girls were going on with practice. Suddenly, Captain Chono glanced down range, and her eyes went wide.

"Merciful Buddha! Who's been doing that shooting?" Downrange, every target in sight had been hit. "Who's manning that main gun?"

Sakaki popped out of the top hatch. "Oh! Captain Chono! Is something wrong?"

"Wrong? Not in a million years! I've seldom or never seen such shooting! Who's been doing it?"

"We've been letting Osaka have a try at shooting the big gun. She's wanted to ever since we decided to take up Tankery. I hope she hasn't done too much damage, ma'am."

Captain Chono was utterly flabbergasted, and so were Tomo, Kagura and Kaori. "Osaka? You mean _Osaka_ aimed those shots?" Sakaki looked downrange and her eyes went very wide.

"I was loading for her, but, yes, she was doing all the shooting. Hey, Osaka! Come on out! Captain Chono wants to talk to you!" Sakaki scrambled out of the hatch and stood on the turret, as Osaka emerged, looking around with her usual look of wide-eyed wonder.

"Is somethin' wrong, ma'am? Ah swear, Ah was tryin' mah best…"

"You were 'trying your best?' How many times have you ever fired that gun before?" Captain Chono came closer, looking at Osaka very carefully. Before this, she had tended to ignore the spacey transfer student, and the other girls had quietly concluded that their spruce, always-on-top-of-things coach wasn't too likely to grant a spot on the main team to someone as off in her own little world as Osaka.

"Why, this is the first time, ma'am, now that Ah think on it. The other girls been hoggin' the gunner's seat, an' all they'd let _me_ do was load. Sakaki, here, finally told me to take a turn; she said that it wasn't doin' right by me to not let me have mah chance." Captain Chono looked sternly at the other girls, who all suddenly looked very innocent. "Was I doin' all right, ma'am?"

"You were doing perfectly, dear! Let's see you do it again! Sakaki, dear, do you mind loading for our Miss Kasuga?" Sakaki nodded. She'd been looking downrange, and she was just as impressed as Captain Chono.

Captain Chono spoke into her cell phone, and fresh targets were raised down the range. "Take them in any order, dear," she said to Osaka, who nodded and peered into the gunsights. Sakaki stood ready with a shell, waiting for the order to load the main gun.

Osaka snapped: "Load!" Sakaki smoothly slipped the shell into the big gun and closed the breech, and Osaka triggered the gun. The SU-100 jerked back a little on its treads as the recoil hit it, but Osaka ignored that completely, being absorbed in traversing the gun and raising its elevation. "Load!" Again the big gun spoke, and they went through five more repetitions before Osaka turned away from the sights. "Ah think Ah got all them targets, Captain. Want me to try for 'em again?"

Captain Chono had been watching through the commander's periscope, and she shook her head absently. "No, dear. I'm going to get Yomi in here, and we'll see how you do when the tank is moving."

Yomi had been watching, and she was just as awed by Osaka's deadly marksmanship as the other girls. She said softly to Tomo: "You know, I never knew that girl could shoot like that. I think we may have to start being nicer to her." Tomo nodded.

When Captain Chono called her, Yomi ran over and scrambled into the SU-100, wriggling into the driver's seat. She stabbed at the ignition button, and the big engine roared to life. Once she had the tank started, Captain Chono had them put up more targets, and Yomi began slewing the tank to port, following Osaka's directions.

Osaka raised and lowered the big gun, firing at one target after another as the tank slowly spun on its axis. When the last of the targets was history, Captain Chono had Sakaki look through the view slots, and then Yomi got a look.

Sakaki said: "We have a gunner, I think."

When the other girls on the Oorai High Tankery team saw what Osaka could do, they were awestruck.

"Where the hell were you last year?" asked Miho. "We could have used you then!"

Osaka gave her a vague look. "Ah was back at Azu High, dear. Ain't you rememberin'?" The Azu girls smiled to themselves. Watching new people having their first experience of dealing with the Osaka way of seeing the world was always amusing.

When they finally agreed on a roster, it went as follows:

Commander: Sakaki

Gunner: Osaka

Loader: Tomo

Driver: Yomi

Radio: Kagura

Kaori was held back as a substitute, to be fielded if one of the other girls couldn't play, and Chiyo-chan was Official Mascot and Good-Luck Charm. With that settled, they next needed to find a name for themselves.

"No, Osaka, we are _not_ going to call ourselves the Jackalope Team. I don't care what your uncle who went to Texas says," said Sakaki. Osaka gave Sakaki a hurt look, but subsided under the glares of the others.

They batted animal names around for a while. "How about Horse Team?" asked Tomo. She looked dreamy; the others knew she liked horses.

"It makes us sound like we should be pullin' a cart," said Osaka. Nods of agreement from the others, and "Horse Team" went into the discard.

Chiyo-chan looked over at Sakaki. The reserved tank captain was taking no part in the discussion. She had found a magazine for cat fanciers, and was paging through it, longing on her face. Chiyo-chan had a wonderful idea.

"How about us being the Cat Team? Everybody loves cats, don't they?" Sakaki perked up, discarding the magazine and joining the discussion, as the others started nodding.

"Cat Team? Sounds like a natural! Can't see why none of the others thought of it!" Kagura was smiling. "And cats are cute, just like us!"

"Ah love the idea," drawled Osaka.

A few minutes later, and they decided unanimously to be the Cat Team. Ceremoniously, Sakaki took some paint and painted the name "Kitty Cat" on the front of the SU-100, along with a rather well-executed rendition of a domestic cat on each side of the casemate.

Miho and the rest of the Tankery girls were very pleased; they all took pride in their individual tanks' names and records, and seeing the Azu girls joining in was a good sign. "Our first match is coming up in a couple of weeks," burbled Saori, "and we're looking forward to seeing how you do!"

"Who're we up against?" asked Sakaki. As commander, she often acted as spokeswoman for the Azu contingent. "I'd like to get some idea of what we'll be facing."

"Let's go look!" The year's Tankery competition schedule was up on one of the school walls, having just been posted there, and all the girls went over to see who they were up against. At the sight of the poster, their eyes went wide.

"We're going up against Pravda High, out of Hokkaido." Miho looked very worried. "They're tough customers. Trust me on this!"

"Can you give me descriptions of their last few matches? I want to look over them and find out what their style is. I may just have a few ideas that might work," said Sakaki. "History's one of my very best subjects, and with enough data about how this bunch operate, I might be able to come up with a few surprises to make our Russian-wanna-be friends wish they'd stayed in Russia." She looked grim for a second. "I had relatives who had to get out of Karafuto."

"Don't you have a cousin who plays for Pravda High?" asked Miho.

"You mean Nonna? I know she's my cousin, but we haven't seen each other since we were small. Her family spent time in Siberia, back after the war," nodded Sakaki. "That might explain why she's willing to play for that particular team."


	4. Chapter 4

Azumanga und Panzer!

Chapter Four

by Technomad

"Where are we playing against Pravda?" asked Sakaki. Beside her, Chiyo-chan looked up eagerly at their team Captain. The rest of the Azu High transfers were gathered behind her, eager for information.

Miho scowled slightly. "We're facing them on their home ground; it's the same field that we used last time around. It'll be snowy, and get dark quickly." She shook her head. "Again, just like last time."

"Can we see the map of the field we'll be going on to?" asked Sakaki. Miho nodded, and passed them a map. Sakaki spread it out, and looked at it, with Chiyo-chan peeking over her shoulder and the rest of Cat Team also getting a look.

"Where are our starting points? Both us and the Pravda High girls?" Miho pointed to two symbols on the map, at opposite ends, and Sakaki began to form a plan. "Get the other teams in here; I want to talk to them."

When Sakaki explained her idea, the other girls were agog with delight. "Why didn't we think of _that_ before?" they lamented. "How did you come up with it?"

Sakaki favored them with a rare smile. "I was reading about the 'Ghost Army' that Patton commanded in the South of England just before D-Day, and had a flash of inspiration."

All the girls on Hippo Team groaned in unison. "We should have thought of that one!" lamented Erwin.

"I'm an idiot!" Caesar slapped her forehead to signify shame. "I'm a disgrace to the study of history!"

"Don't feel bad," Chiyo-chan said, smiling. "Sakaki here's real good at history. She had straight 'A's in it all through our time at Azu High." Sakaki blushed slightly, but did not deny her little friend's statement.

"We still have a week or so to go before the big match," said Sazaemon, "so we'd better get cracking!"

As Hippo Team scampered off to implement Sakaki's plan, Sakaki felt a tug on her sleeve. She turned to see Nakajima, the commander of Leopon Team. "What can I do for you, Nakajima?" she asked politely.

"We heard that you had one more girl than you could use," Nakajima said shyly. "We were wondering if you'd mind if she joined our team. We're all on the same side, after all. And we need one more girl to really operate that Porsche Tiger. She can be our radio operator. If that's all right?"

"You mean Kaori? I don't think we'd have any problem with that. She might enjoy getting to know people outside our little clique. You'll have to ask her."

When she was asked, Kaori was quite willing. "I'd much rather be out on the field than sitting on the sidelines! I'd love to join you!" And with that, the Leopon Team acquired its fifth member, and was able for the first time to properly crew its Porsche Tiger. She took the job of radio operator.

By the time of the match, all was in readiness. Miho smiled when she thought about what would happen. "If I read her right, Katyusha will waltz right into this trap, and she'll never see it till it's too late!" she gloated quietly to the other girls, over a snack at the Tankery snack shop.

"She does strike me as the sort of person who'll snap at our bait," Sakaki commented, as she tucked into a "Sherman" sundae.

As predicted, the playing field was snowy, and the sun was setting rapidly, leaving the field illuminated by a full moon in the Hokkaido sky. The signal to begin was given, and both teams began to move out.

"Cat Team is in position," reported Kagura, once the _Kitty Cat_ was in the place that they had picked out earlier for it. Two clicks of the microphone from Miho told her that the message was received. Messages also came in from Leopon, Hippo, Turtle, Mallard and Rabbit Teams, all reporting that they had taken up their prescribed positions.

"Very good," came Miho's voice. "Begin Operation Fisherman!"

Katyusha was determined to win, this time. She had not forgotten how she had been stupidly overconfident against the ragtag team from Oorai last year, and this time, she vowed, she would crush the upstarts beneath the treads of her tank! She knew that her team had the advantage of numbers, and planned to take full advantage of that. The KV-2 and IS-2 also played a prominent role in her planning; she didn't think that most of Oorai High's tanks could stand up against them.

"Nonna," she snapped into her radio, "make sure that the other tanks all stay in formation! We're not taking chances with those Oorai girls this time!"

"_Da_, comrade captain!" Katyusha nodded, smiling fiercely. She knew she could count on Nonna. The tall, quiet girl made a good partner, she thought.

"Very well, advance! We know roughly where the enemy is, so this time we take no chances! We've more tanks than they do, so we should be able to crush them with sheer numbers just as Comrade Stalin did the Fascists during the Great Patriotic War!" In her T-34/85, she took the lead as Pravda High moved to the attack, easily passing through the drifted snow.

"Cat Team reporting. All is going as planned," murmured Kagura. Sakaki was watching through the _Kitty Cat'_s periscope, which was the only thing that protruded over the snowdrift they had parked the SU-100 behind. They had draped the tank destroyer with white sheets to camouflage it, and had counted on that, the gathering darkness, and what they had been told about Katyusha to keep them concealed. It apparently had worked; the entire contingent from Pravda High had gone charging past, paying them absolutely no mind.

"Anteater Team, Duck Team, get ready to move out. And good luck to you!" Miho did not stay on the air long; while Pravda High's tanks did not all have radios, preferring to depend on wigwag flags from the command tanks like their Soviet models had, there was no reason for them to get overconfident and chattery. Katyusha was nobody to underestimate.

After a few minutes, the signal came: "Cat Team, it's time." Yomi nodded and fired up the engine. In seconds, the big tank destroyer had burst through its concealing snowdrift, slewing around in its own length to charge down after the disappearing Pravda High tanks.

Their engine was better than the T-34s' on the Pravda team, and soon the rear of the Pravda formation was in sight, although still well out of most guns' range. However, the SU-100's main gun was designed for long-range work. Sakaki smiled. The plan was working to perfection. "You remember what you're to do, Osaka?" she asked.

"Ah sho'ly do, Cap'n!" Osaka drawled, putting her eyes to the gunsights. "Yomi, darlin', could you slew us just a _teeny_ bit to the left?" Yomi nodded, and Kitty Cat moved slightly to the left as Osaka made minute adjustments to the aim. "Perfect! Load!" Tono slammed a shell into the breach and closed it. Osaka triggered the gun, and the whole vehicle shook with the recoil as the big gun roared.

"Hit! That's a hit!" Sakaki shouted. She knew that nobody outside of _Kitty Cat_ could hear her. "That's their KV-2 out! Can you get their IS-2 next, Osaka?"

"Ah can see it, that means Ah can hit it! Bring us to the right, Yomi, darlin'!" Yomi steered more to the right, while Osaka lowered the muzzle of the main gun. "Little more…little more…_there_! Load, Tono!"

Katyusha was _not_ having a good day. Oh, it had started out well, but things had rapidly gone downhill once the match had begun.

It had all seemed so easy! She had seen the Oorai High tanks, all in formation, barrelling along like they didn't have a care in the world, and had instantly given orders to swarm down on them like Zhukov at Kursk. Just as they got ready to open fire, all of a sudden the KV-2 was reporting that it had been hit and knocked out! And none of the tanks ahead of them had even fired!

"_Shto_? How in the world…" Katyusha popped her head out of the turret hatch just in time to see her precious IS-2 take a direct hit and slew off to one side, a white flag popping out of the turret to signify that it was out of the match. "What is happening?" She peered around frantically, and happened to be looking behind her formation just in time to see a muzzle flash and make out the outline of an unfamiliar, deadly-looking tank coming up behind them.

"_Bozhe moi_! It's a trap of some sort!" She yelled to her team: "Take out the tanks in front of us! I'll engage the one behind us!" She dropped back into the turret and began traversing it frantically, wishing that the damn designers had done a better job with the T-34/85 she commanded from. Another crew member would have been very welcome!

The other tanks were merrily shooting the daylights out of the Oorai formation in front of them…but then Nonna's voice came over the radio. "Comrade captain! There's something wrong! We shot a bunch of their tanks, and they disappeared! Completely!"

"_Shto_?" Katyusha leaped for her periscope to see, and, sure enough, all but two of the Oorai tanks that her formation had been bearing down upon were utterly gone. Wiped off the earth, apparently. There were two of them still there, both of them with white flags signifying that they were knocked out, but as she watched, another of her own tanks took a direct hit and ran up the white flag.

"Now!" Miho snapped into her radio, and her tank leaped forward from its hiding place, along with the others she had stationed in various hides around the battlefield. The Pravda High forces were in utter disarray, and their heaviest, most dangerous units were out of the fight, so it was time to finish them off!

Rabbit Team and Hippo Team charged out from behind some trees, their main guns blazing as they came to bear on the Pravda High tanks. The Pravda High girls had been focussed on what was ahead of them, and at first, they didn't seem to know what to do; their tanks milled around uncertainly, their turrets traversing almost at random. Before they could do much, Rabbit and Hippo Teams were on them, and their opponents just about couldn't fire for fear of hitting teammates.

Aboard their M-3 Lee, Rabbit Team screamed with joy as they took out a T-34/85. "Payback's a bitch, _bitches_!" yelled Sawa. Like the rest of the Rabbit Team, she hadn't forgotten the contemptous ease with which Pravda had taken them out last time around, and it was sweet, sweet revenge to turn the tables on them so decisively. "Good shooting, Yamago!"

Up in the turret, the 37-mm gun barked, and Maruyama shouted triumphantly. "Took the bogie wheel off that one just ahead to the right!"

"Good! Slew us to the right, and Yamago can finish them off!"

"On it, ma'am!" Sakaguchi threw the M-3 to the right, as Yamago loaded the 75mm gun and got ready to fire. The second she had a good clear shot, Yamago triggered the gun, and they could see the T-34 rock, before a white flag popped out of its turret, signifying surrender.

Just then, two shells struck the side of the Lee, and they could feel it shuddering to a stop as the familiar sound of the white flag popping up sounded inside the tank. Even though they were out of the fight, it felt very good to at least have got up on the scoreboard. Sawa leaned back in her seat, sighing. "I think we all did very well. I couldn't be prouder of you, and I know Miho will be, too."

Meanwhile, Hippo Team was charging in to the attack. They couldn't traverse their gun easily without turning their whole vehicle, but the sheer punch of their gun made up for a lot. Erwin yelled "There they are! Let 'em have it, Saemonza!" The gunner nodded, triggering the big gun and hitting a T-34 squarely in the side, knocking it out. A shell screamed past, but the low profile of their vehicle saved them; it passed just overhead.

In her Panzer, Miho was looking for the other side's command tank. At first, she couldn't see it, but then she spotted the telltale flag, fluttering from the turret of a T-34/85. "Hana! That tank ahead, a little ways to the left! Hit it!"

"Yes, ma'am!" The big gun was loaded, and Hana triggered it. The Pravda flag tank rocked with the impact of the shell, but wasn't out of the fight…until two more shells hit it, almost simultaneously, from Leopon Team and Mallard Team. The Russian tank shuddered to a stop, smoke pouring out of its engine compartment and with one tread shot clean off, as the white flag of surrender popped out of the top of its turret.

"We _did_ it! _Banzai_!" screamed Miho.

Over the field, the disembodied voice of the announcer intoned: "Pravda High's command tank is knocked out. Victory for Oorai High School!" The watchers cheered lustily from their safe vantage point in the stands.

Katyusha was not having a good time at all. The last two shells that had hit her tank had thrown her against the inside of the turret, very hard, and by the time the match was over, she was trying not to cry from the pain of a broken arm. Once things were over, her radio operator sent out a distress call, and soon she was being gently raised out of the main hatch to be looked over by some medics. Medics were always on call at a Tankery match; while injuries were not common, they were far from unknown.

Nonna was holding her on her lap, soothing her and singing a soft Russian song to keep her distracted, while the medics applied a splint to her upper arm. When they were done, and had given her a shot of painkiller to keep her comfortable until she could be medivaced, she looked around to see Miho Nishizumi looking at her, concern in her eyes. Katyusha was very unhappy about losing the match, but she knew her duty as a commander.

"Congratulations on your second win over us, Nishizumi-san," she said, proud that her voice was steady. "Your plan was a thing of beauty! How did you make those tanks disappear?"

"I was wondering that myself," Nonna said. "Do you have some way to make tanks disappear and reappear where you want them to be?"

"Nothing so complicated as all that," Miho replied, with a smile. "And it wasn't my plan. Sakaki, here, came up with it." Katyusha caught her breath as a near-twin to her dear friend Nonna came into view, and she could feel Nonna tense up. "I believe you two know each other?"

"We do," said Nonna. "Hello, cousin. It's been a very long time, hasn't it?"

Sakaki nodded. "It has, Nonna…or should I say, 'Noriko?' That _is_ your birth name, after all."

Nonna smiled. "Call me by either name. It's good to see you. So that was your plan, was it?"

"How did you do that?" Katyusha piped up. "I've not been able to figure it out!"

Sakaki gave them a rare gamine grin, full of mischief. "Oh, that was simple. We had our two weakest tanks, Duck Team's Type 89b and Anteater Team's Type 3 Chi-Nu, towing a bunch of inflatable tank mock-ups behind them in formation. We figured that you'd think that those were the rest of our tanks and attack them. Meanwhile, all but one of the rest of our tanks were waiting nearby, and when you got past us, we came out and jumped you from behind."

"All but one?"

"The one that was sniping your heaviest units was our newest tank, the Cat Team's SU-100 tank destroyer. Those girls are the ones from Azu High, and their gunner's a genius. What she can see, she can hit, and with that long-ranged gun, she's a real sniper!" Miho gestured at the Azu High girls, who had dismounted Kitty Cat and gathered around, curious to meet the other team's commander, about whom they'd heard so much.

Osaka's eyes went even wider than usual when she saw that Katyusha was hurt. "Oh, dear! Did Ah do that? I'm so sorry…"

"No, no, don't worry about it. We all take risks." Katyusha waved off Osaka's apologies. "What kind of range were you hitting my tanks from?"

"Ah sho'ly don't know for sho', but Ah think I got yo' KV-2 from 1200 meters, an' yo' JS-2 from only a little less." At that, Katyusha's eyes went very wide.

"Bozhe moi! If you ever want to transfer into my school, I can find a place for you on our Tankery team!" Katyusha smiled ruefully. "And if I have to lose again, I've got to say that it feels less bad to have lost to a Soviet-built machine!

END Chapter 4

(Author's note: I have incorporated some suggestions from my first reviewer, which I thought were pretty good, and would like to thank that reviewer for giving me useful feedback.)


End file.
